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Networking Gets a Bad Rap: And Other Untruths I’d Like to Dispel

It’s time we turned your whisper into a roar or whatever form of making yourself known feels authentic to you.  Ruth Bader Ginsberg had the softest, gentlest of voices.  She was parsimonious with her speech, but boy when she parted her lips to express a belief, she made a point, and her points had points.  The sharp barb of truth, the insightful pinning down of the injustice, the prick of wisdom that leaves an incessant reminder of the conversation, returning to you in throbbing pulses throughout the day, that was Ruth’s way.  I am hoping that this article will help you to find YOUR way, because networking is essential to your success.  Don’t go looking over your shoulder for someone else – that someone that you have decided is really responsible for networking, the one person that is “good” at it.  I’m speaking to you, it matters not what job, or title you possess, whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, a middle child or an only child, every last one of us needs, and relies on a network, for our personal and professional wellbeing. 

Human nature is at the heart of this networking thing.  Maslow, a famed psychologist, developed the Hierarchy of Needs, a psychological theory that outlines, pyramid style, how we humans are motivated.  There are the deficiency needs and the growth needs.  The “D”’s must be met before we can even begin to think about growing and becoming our most self-actualized persons, and wouldn’t you know, sitting right smack dab in the middle of that hierarchy is Love and Belongingness.  We need to belong, not as desperately as we need air, food, and sleep, but it’s right there at level three.  The magical part of this level is the concept of Affiliating, which is just a fancy way of saying we like being part of groups.  A family, friends, work, church, sports leagues, industry groups, they all represent ways in which we choose to fulfill this need.  All these groups make up your network.

Networks, at their core offer people support, a sounding board, the offer of help, or a reciprocal exchange of resources, and importantly they contribute significantly to your professional growth, and that of the company that employs you.  A frequently quoted truth is “all things being equal, people do business with, and refer business to, those people they know, like, and trust.”  This is the antithesis of the derogatory connotations so many hold of networking.  It is not a business card exchange, an opportunity to hobnob, rub elbows, fraternize or chum up to people.  Done authentically, it is an opportunity to build relationships, share mutual interests, and support one another’s success.  Growing a career, business, and/or relationship is a wonderfully beneficial thing to do.  Leading expert on Networking, Julie Brown, and author of This Sh!T Works:  A no-nonsense guide to networking your way to more friends, more adventures, and more success offers these tips for networking during these unconventional times:

  • Do you know who’s in your network?  Put a list together of everyone you know, dig deep, review your Linkedin connections asking yourself if you really know the person, and when the last time you reached out, include neighbors, parents, co-workers, college friends, volunteer organizations, and those with whom you are engaged in projects.  Nothing is off-limits here – if there is human interaction, and genuine interest – put them on the list,
  • Industry Organizations Still Exist:  look into their virtual program offerings, their creative handling of networking, and ask friends and colleagues who is doing it best – making it easy and worthwhile to participate (don’t be afraid to share what you’ve learned with others),
  • Strategic Introductions:  one of the most important ways in which you can offer help is through an introduction.  When you extend yourself in this way – it is not forgotten,
  • Create Your Own Event:  while the weather is good, take a walk, grab an outdoor coffee, get a few industry friends or clients together for BYO Picnic to commune and catch up.  We all miss a friendly face,
  • Get Social:  There has been a huge uptick in social media engagement during the pandemic.  Write an article, share an article, recommend a service, visibility is key.

Like the notorious RBG, you need not be the loudest voice, or the flashiest person in the room to build connections and leave an impression.  Lead with the mindset of helping, giving not selling, and checking in and being of service.  This thoughtful approach will help flip the script on this networking narrative for the benefit of us all.


 

About the Author: As Director of Client Services, Jacqueline Falla is responsible for developing strategic Client Engagement, and growth plans, in collaboration with the leadership team, for Elaine Construction $120M Corporate/Commercial and Institutional business. Falla brings to bear her skills in relationship and visibility building, technical writing, and client service.  She serves on the Board of the AGC-MA and CoreNet Global New England.  She chairs the AGC-MA’s Building Women in Construction Committee, sits on the North Atlantic Regional Council for the Society of College and University Planners, and is the Host of IFMA Boston’s FM Forward Podcast.  Falla is currently working on her book, My Life in Sawdust:  How to make a million in 10 flips.  Track here adventures at:  www.questforthenest.com

 

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Jacqueline Falla, Elaine Construction
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